Back to Running

Part of this experience was supposed to include more running.  However, it was harder to do that considering the sun goes down at 5ish.  Well, now the days are getting longer and I don't have to study the difference between unilateral and bilateral contracts, so I can pick up the frequency of my runs.

My new running shoes were on my front doorstep when I got home on Tuesday, after Day 1 of the exam.  I love my Brooks Adrenaline because they always fit just right so I don't have to bother with shoe shopping (which I cannot stand).

I went for a quick 3 mile run tonight with the dogs and got back just as it was getting dark. Hopefully, I'll get up to a 7 mile run this month. I can do 5 without much problem, so I think 7 is reasonable.

And now I don't have to listen to bar prep on my Ipod while running.  Ahhhh....

Done

Done.  5 months after I got the "unsuccessful" letter, I am done with Bar Exam, Take 2.

After today, I feel almost the same as I did the last time, which I think is a good thing, considering I only missed it by a point.  I paced myself better, but still did not have enough time.  I always wonder how people finish 30 minutes early.

This time, I felt like I was able to eliminate wrong answers much quicker, yet I wasn't always happy with the answer I was left with.  MBE practice reminds us to select the "best" answer, though it might not always be right.

After today, I don't want to hear anything about landlords and tenants, nor anything to do with deeds.  I don't care who recorded first.  I don't care if the municipal library was adversely possessed or not.  

We need to average about 6 points per essay and about 65% right on the MBE in order to pass in NC.  That means that getting 70-80 questions out of 200 wrong is "normal."  Knowing that doesn't make the dreadful feeling of failing go away. The solace is knowing that people do pass this and many feel equally as ambushed as I do right now.

I am tired.  Drinking wine and listening to Howard Stern.  I put away my bar prep materials because I am just tired right now and really don't want to see these green books ever, ever, ever, again.

What's done is done and now the challenge is knowing that there is nothing I can do now to change my results.  I passed, or I didn't.  The thing about failing is that you lose that innocence/ignorance of knowing what failing feels like.  I wonder if that makes it easier...if I don't pass, I know I'll survive.  I'm just really ready to get this under my belt.

Blurbs as an Essay

The Evidence question regarded exclusion of witnesses.  Evidence is one of my best subjects and I blew this question.  But, to my defense, I'm betting everyone else did too.  The applicable law needed to answer it is 3 lines in the big BarBri book and 3 lines in the NC distinctions section.  Rule 615.  Ask me anything about hearsay and I've got you covered.  But, exclusion of witnesses in a civil trial (which is very different than a criminal trial)...all wrong.  It almost seems unfair to premise at least 6 of my precious evidence points on a rule that occupies 1/100th of the entire subject matter of evidence to be covered on the exam.

All I can hope is that Rule 615 comes up tomorrow on the MBE so that I can recover a point, out of the 6 I lost today. Sigh....

The rule (maybe I got a few points since I said the party witness should not have been excluded):
Rule 615. Exclusion of witnesses.
At the request of a party the court may order witnesses excluded so that they cannot hear the testimony of other witnesses, and it may make the order of its own motion. This rule does not authorize exclusion of (1) a party who is a natural person, or (2) an officer or employee of a party that is not a natural person designated as its representative by its attorney, or (3) a person whose presence is shown by a party to be essential to the presentation of his cause, or (4) a person whose presence is determined by the court to be in the interest of justice. (1983, c. 701, s. 1.)

Day One, Done

And, in case any of you are wondering...it doesn't feel any better.  There is still the feeling that I didn't do enough, but I've learned that that's a common feeling.  I've been doing well on multis, so I hope that tomorrow I can do well enough to recover for any deficiencies today.

A few questions were relating to topics that I had at least a 6 point knowledge of (we're told we need to average 6 points an essay to pass).  And, on the topics I didn't know so well, I think I may have managed at least 6 points on those.  And, then of course, there are a few questions where my score will depend on how others answered, so that is my hope for the Secured transactions question regarding a bankruptcy trustee and bank accounts.  It was question #12 and I had only 15 minutes left to answer it.  I don't think extra time would have given me more time for a better answer, but one can only hope that no one else knew a lick about set-offs and bankruptcy.

I shared a table with another person who failed in July by one point.  I hope he passes, too.  If anyone ever wanted to depict "WTF?,"  I'm sure that they would see that look on our faces after a bar exam session.

You can study and study and study and get hit with something you've never seen.  You can give it your all and still feel like it wasn't enough.  We just won't know until 5 weeks from now whether we are minimally competent enough.

So, while I had intended to completely rest tonight, I am going to look over some MBE stuff for insurance.  Of course, I'll do that over a glass of wine...

The Saturday Before

Last night, I had a bit of a breakdown.  I did 100 released MBE multis and did quite well, so that allayed some fears.  However, I still am trying to balance the need to feel in control of this beast and the consequential need to know everything.  I know it's not logical, nor reasonable, to know everything that could be tested on Tuesday and Wednesday.  Nonetheless, the more I know, the more in control I'll feel....or so I think.

After the boo-hooing, I poured a glass of wine and got back to studying.  I made flashcards of critical concepts that I either need to know cold or don't quite know so well.  I finished up Torts and Secured Transactions.  This morning, I knocked out Real Property, Criminal Law, and Criminal Procedure.  I am going to work on Evidence and Contracts/Sales while I watch the UNC game.

But, despite the breakdown last night, I feel OK.  I just took a few minutes to clean up the house.  Tonight, I'm heading out to a nice dinner for a work function with the boyfriend.  I doubt I'll get any more studying done after that and you know what...that's quite OK.

 Tomorrow's plan includes flashcarding for Civil Procedure, Family Law, Mortgages, and Professional Responsibility.  Then I'll pour a glass of wine (or a beer) and read over some of those not-so-commonly-tested-but-not-going-to-press-my-luck topics like Trusts, Suretyship, and such. And then more flashcards of the big topics.  And then more flashcards.  And then more wine.  And then more flashcards.  And then....

Monday I will rest.  I'll go for a run, do some yoga, get a pedicure, maybe watch a movie....

There comes a point when you just can't add any more info to your brain's capacity.  Sometimes it's necessary to let it "sit" for a while....like when you open a cellared bottle of red wine.

Monday will be for decanting.

A trust is....

Those were my first thoughts this morning upon awakening.  My last thoughts before bedtime involved involuntary dismissals and being taxed for the costs of the action.  In a week from today, I will be finishing up lunch before embarking on the last session of the bar exam.

I've gone through essays and written out rules.  I've done multis.  Yet, sometimes I still feel like I can't possibly remember all of this for the bar exam....and then I wake up thinking about the definition of a trust, and I realize I know what it is.  And, just like that came out of nowhere this morning, it will similarly make itself available for regurgitation on Tuesday.

Last night, I was reading some posts on a forum for people taking the bar and was surprised to see how many had unsupportive significant others.  I am definitely lucky in that regard.  Now, if he would just take the test for me, I'd be a happy woman.  I know I'm not alone when I speak for other bar exam takers---the support of family and partners means more than they'll ever know---

Today's plan:

Massage--already done (didn't realize how much tension I've been storing in my body)

Lunch-already done (need to be reminded to eat)

Finish Yellow BarBri book.

Write out important rules for my weaker subjects (Secured Transactions, Mortgages, Sales).

60 PMBR multis.

Tomorrow:

February and July 2007, and February and July 2008 bar exams

Review 2005, 2006 exams that I did yesterday

60 PMBR multis

Friday:

100 Question Timed 2006 MBE (new questions)

Write rules for weak topics.

Saturday:

100 Question Timed BarBri or PMBR set

Review weak topics/concepts

Dinner with SigO

Sunday:

1 hour each major NC topic (review outline, write out rules)

Monday:

Long workout at gym

Long walk with dogs

Dinner with SigO

Long Bath

Glass of Wine

Yoga

Tuesday:

Are you ready to rumble?????

(As a writer, I'll be in the Dorton Arena, home of the Carolina Rollergirls--I think I'll try to adopt a Rollergirl attitude as I knock those questions out of play.)

OK, back to studying....

Brick Walls and Breaks

9 days until the big day and I am just.not.motivated. Maybe it's the prospect of a whole week to memorize NC law ad nauseam and write essays and look at old exams?  Maybe it's the fact that I've now been studying for the bar Exam for about 5 months (adding in my July study time) and I'm just sick of the UCC, the FRE, the NCRCP, the UPA., the MPC, et.al.?  In fact, the only acronyms I am interested in these days are ACC and WTF. 

My dear friend (who passed the bar in July) says that this week before the exam should be best utilized to "manage anxiety."  Somehow I feel like I should study 12 hours a day for the next week, but I just don't think that's a realistic goal.  Last time, with a week to go before the exam, I was still looking at NC topics for the first time since the BarBri lecture (that I hardly paid attention to due to my inability to sit still and watch anything on a screen).  I was still learning about priority in consumer goods, fixtures, defamation, etc.  This time, I've already done that, so the feeling that I need to cram is just not present this time.  I'd like to think that's a good thing.  Still, the prospect of writing an essay for real is still scary, but motivating.  I know I will know as much as I can know come next Sunday and honestly, that's all I can do.  At this point in the game, studying an extra 2-3 hours a day is useless if it causes me more anxiety and stress.

In good news, I'm scoring about 70% on MBE multis and I've improved my timing.  I will still do 30 multis a day until Saturday, when I will do a 100 question set (timed).  I will do all of the essays in the BarBri yellow book and I will write out complete answers for the past 3 years of old NC exams.  I will outline the essays for another 3 years of essays.

I will also get a massage on Wednesday and I will go out to run a few afternoons this week.  I will also make sure to get enough sleep so that I don't get sick before the exam.  I am managing my anxiety.

I did go for a study break beer on Friday night.  I also enjoyed a nice dinner out with the wonderful sig other who is certainly tired of hearing me talk about this test.  He (very politely) suggested that I try to take a break from it for a few hours last night, which I interpreted as him telling me he needed a break from hearing about it.  Nonetheless, it was nice to talk about all the fun things that are coming up after the exam.  Breaks are good.  Relaxing is good. But...

9 days???!!!!   WTF?

70 Degrees and Beginning to Sweat

It's going to be another 70 degree day today and I beginning to sweat.  I am hoping to do some studying in my backyard, in the sun, while my dogs take naps in the grass and dream of squirrels.  I, on the other hand, will see if I can finally understand those rules of law that I haven't been able to get (recording statutes,  third party beneficiaries, privilege and immunity clause of 14th Amendment, etc.).

Property will be done today, as well as about 20 multis in Torts, Crim Law, Evidence, and Con Law. Tomorrow I will start Contracts (my last MBE topic!!!!) Come Wednesday evening, I will be in all review mode.

16 days until the Big Day.  I will be writing the exam in the Dorton Arena, which is alternatively used for roller derby games and concerts for the State Fair.  I am already trying to figure out what I will wear that day because somehow I am guessing that the temperature controls will be wacky.

I am getting a bit more nervous, but also a bit more confident.  I still have 16 days.  I only have 16 days left.  

 

Frustration of Purpose and Confusion of the Issues

Two legal phrases that best describe my mental state right now.

Last night, after scoring 78% on an Evidence practice set, I decided to go to bed. I was late anyway, but I did finish Evidence. For some reason, I decided to take my July 2008 Bar Exam essays to bed with me. Bad idea.

My undergrad degree is Education, so I learned how to test students and also how to give feedback. I was reminded last night that the bar examiners who write (and grade) those exams are lawyers, not teachers. For one, having essays with no writing on them to indicate where I did get points left me wondering where I really went wrong, especially when my essay covers the same things as a "model" essay. Was it my knowledge of the law that didn't come through as coherently? Did I not say the magic phrase? Second, knowing my score on an essay is almost useless if you don't know the overall range of scores---if average was a 5, then my 3 wasn't so bad after all.

I was also reminded of the range of my scores and that reminded me that different people write each question and grade it. So, it's obvious that the person who graded my Wills essay gave no points for about 10 things I mentioned that were also mentioned in the model essay. I could have written a letter to Santa on that essay and received as many points as I did actually writing about the issue (that would be 0 points). Yes, I got 0 points on an essay. It is a myth that if you identify the issue and write some basic, applicable rules, you'll get at least a point. Not true.

One point is all I have to recover, but I am aiming to recover a lot more. As for coverage, I am now down to Torts, Contracts, and Property (and their respective NC topics). I'm also down to 23 days until showtime. From today on out, it's at least 6 hours of studying a day until I take off time from work. At that point, it will be 8-10 hours a day. But, I will only be reviewing, which will be different than last time. Right now, I am feeling confident about the MBE, but not so confident about the essays. But, that is kinda where I expected to be at this point in the game---I wanted to get the MBE topics under my belt so that I could focus on memorizing NC law and writing essays in the home stretch.

I will pass the bar. I will pass the bar. I will pass the bar.

Con Law Done!

The good thing about Constitutional Law is that there's not really a NC-specific set of laws that are different than the majority.  So, in other words, if Con Law comes up on the NC essays (which it usually does), then most of the knowledge about Con Law needed for MBE will be sufficient to, at least, get by on the NC essay.  That's different that some of the other MBE topics because there are substantial variations in NC law that conflict with (or distinguish us from) the majority.

So, topic tally:  Con Law, Agency/Partnerships, Corporations, Wills, Trusts, Liens and Suretyships, Professional Responsibility, Family Law.  Not bad, at least not for the second time around.

While I was studying tonight, I was thinking about how much different the study of law probably is from other disciplines.  The laws are always changing.  Sometimes, no sooner the ink has dried on a new textbook, the SCOTUS hears a case and rules in such a way that invalidates half of the case law you've just read.  I can't imagine the study of science would involve such variance in principles and basic fundamentals.  I mean, a plant is a plant, right?  I doubt one day you're learning about chlorophyll and then you get a news bulletin announcing that the highest ranking biologists have now decided that plants don't have chlorophyll. Studying for the bar exam and for any law school exam means knowing the current law, in addition to the common law, minority law, and the majority (which may or may not be the law in your state).  And just when you think you've got that all figured out, you wake up and read the news to see that SCOTUS has ruled a bit unexpectedly, like they did the other day in Oregon v. Ice.  At least I can feel sigh of relief that that new twist on the law will not be on the bar exam in 5 weeks.

5 weeks?  Seriously???  Where's my wine?

Objectives and Outcomes

This is where this blog might get quite boring.  Crunch time is here.  Sigh....

My undergraduate degree is in Foreign Language Education.  One of the most helpful things I learned was how to set goals, define objectives, and measure outcomes.  Our lessons plans couldn't just say "teach present tense conjugation of verbs ending in -ar."  Instead, we were forced to write "students will demonstrate understanding of present tense verbs ending in  -ar by demonstrating 80% accuracy in conjugating 10 common verbs."

The past month has been a warm up for me, but now the fun really begins.  This week, I will tackle NC Wills and finish up Corporations and Professional Responsibility.  I will also do at least 36 MBE multis and write out the answers.  I will start tracking my progress here so that I can make sure I am meeting my own goals.

So, tonight I learned (and can write at least a 6 point essay about):

• Attested, holographic, and nuncupative wills
• Basic requirements for a will to be admitted to probate
• Revocation of wills
• NC lost wills statute
• Dependent Relative Revocation

I also demonstrated 100% accuracy on making a mean mac & cheese and a tomato basil soup to go along with it.  However, this past weekend, my objective of catching at least one fish was not met.  I was able to cast out with about 50% accuracy and was also able to eat a yummy cannoli with 100% accuracy.  If it were not for the bar exam, I would venture to say that accuracy in cannoli eating is a much more useful skill than knowing about nuncupative wills.  Well...unless someone wanted to give me a cannoli on their death bed...I don't think the cannoli would last until probate though, so I would have to have a witness write it down that the cannoli was intended for me.

Alas, the legal fog is setting in and soon my life will be reduced to hypothetical situations....again.

Balancing One Point

I have started studying again and am often asked how my studies are going. Depending on the day, my answer will vary. Sometimes I feel confident, especially when I find that I still remember the characteristics of a join tenancy or the rules regarding piercing the corporate veil. Other times, I feel overwhelmed, like when I realize that I've hardly made process on typing up my corporations outline.

One point is my hurdle, but I have to be certain to study just as hard as I did the last time. I admit that this second time around is much harder to get (and stay) motivated for. The material still looks familiar. I am still getting about 60-70% of my MBE multis right. I can still recite the elements for strict liability.

I am finding that I can run 3-5 miles easily on the treadmill when I have my BarBri outline with me. So, though I am not really progressing on typing up new outlines, I am reading the ones I used this summer and reading the big BarBri book. I have some "Law in a Flash" cards that a friend graciously gave me and those have been helpful, if not for the sole reason that it is a new format.

In other news, I am up to about 6 miles that I can run at one time. My marathon junkie of a brother will take me out on Sunday for a long run (for me...it will be an "easy jog" for him). I am looking forward to seeing my progress on achieving that goal of mine in February.

The good thing about studying so much during the winter is that it is much easier to cozy up on the couch with some hot tea, a kitty on my lap, and a Barbri outline when it's dark and cold outside. But, in all honesty...I look forward to cozying up on my couch next winter with a memoir instead of a bar prep outline.

15 weeks, give or take

The past month has been fun...historic elections, historic sporting events, beer festivals, beach vacations....time is flying by. I realized that the bar exam, take 2 is right around the corner. So...

Last night, I bit the bullet and devised my plan of action for studying. I calculated that I have about 15 weeks of studying ahead of me. My approach to this bar exam will be quite different than my approach to the July exam. First of all, I have more time. Secondly, many of these concepts and rules will still be fresh in my mind, so I won't be learning them for the first time. Lastly, I have a better idea of what will work for me and what won't.

General plan: Start slowly until mid-December (tackle smaller NC topics, do about 50 MBE questions weekly, read outlines). From mid-December until week before Bar exam, tackle 1-2 bigger NC topics and 1 MBE topic. By then, I should be averaging about 100 multis a week, with a few essays thrown in there. The whole week before the exam will be dedicated to review.

If anyone is interested in my specific study plan, I've posted it online should you wish to 1) re-live your experience from this summer as a reminder of how lucky you are to *not* have to be doing this again; 2)compare your study schedule to it; or 3)offer suggestions as to what you found most helpful in your successful endeavor to pass the bar.

Like last time around, I will do my best to make time for myself and for my friends and for my significant other. I will enjoy a glass of wine or a beer in the evenings as I review flashcards. I will eat well and get enough exercise and enough sleep. This time, though...I will pass.

The Morning After--Disappointment Hangover

Two days after I got my "unsuccessful" letter, I am told I am managing well. Mornings are the hardest so far, mainly because when I am awaken by dogs or my internal alarm clock, I can't fall back asleep because I am thinking about the fact that I did not pass the NC Bar exam.

"I regret to inform you that you were unsuccessful on the July 2008 North Carolina Bar Exam." Now, when I opened that letter, I knew that some people would not pass. I did not think I would be one of them. All I had heard for the past 2-3 months was "You'll be fine!" or "Don't worry, I'm sure you aced it!" Or, my personal favorite...."My brother is stupid as can be. If he can pass it, so can you." I know these were all well-intentioned comments, but the bar exam is really a crapshoot. I studied nearly 10 hours a day for the whole month of July. I took BarBri and PMBR. I did 30 multiple choice questions a day. I made notecards, posters, charts. I studied harder in that month than I have ever studied before. And I failed.

By how much? Who knows? In NC, you can only see your score if you fail and request to see the report. But, I have to wait 2 weeks in order to request that. So, as of today, I don't know whether it was the essays that did me in (I felt confident, but essays have never been my strong point) or the MBE (I ran out of time and guessed on a large handful).

The good things:

• I do not have debt from law school (nor any other debt other than the mortgage) and technically, I am still employed in a place where I do not need a license to practice.
• I have a wonderfully supportive family (including my father who is an elementary school guidance counselor and as such, is used to helping kids deal with feelings of failure and disappointment)
  
• Steadfast friends who were surprised that someone as smart as I am (their words) could fail this test (there MUST be something wrong with the test, they say).
  
• The best boyfriend in the whole world who assures me he still loves me even though I failed the bar (and makes sure that my wine or beer glass is always full).
  

In the meantime, I will try to figure out a plan for the next 5-6 months. Surely that will be plenty of time to learn all I need to know about the law. I am also going to train for a half-marathon, with the hope of being successful at something. It has always been a goal of mine to run a marathon, so I figure that I can work towards accomplishing that goal while I work on this other goal of passing the Bar Exam. The tentative plan is to run the Myrtle Beach Half-Marathon on Valentine's Day, with abovementioned BF...2 weeks before Bar Exam: Take 2.

Off to find those stories of famous people who have failed the Bar Exam....